I would like to thank everyone on twitter, some who I know well and some less well, for all your kind congratulatory messages yesterday after I announced the arrival of baby Xanthe.
Somebody noted that "Xanthe is such an ACE name" and inevitably conversation turned to how we picked it. When I explained how we named her, someone else commented "if that's true, that's almost as cool as the name itself!" Intrigued?
We were told at our second ultrasound scan that our expected child was a girl. I've been naturally suspicious of such predictions since my little "brother" turned out to be a little sister all the way back in 1991, so I didn't feel a sudden urgency to have the bedroom decorated pink - but obviously we needed to start thinking about potential names.
Actually, we'd given some thought to names in the recent past. It would have been much easier for a boy in some respects. Given my background, I like Gaelic names and eastern European names (my grandfather was Polish) but Anna is less keen on them, especially when she can't even spell Ciorstaidh or Agnieszka never mind pronounce them. She prefers "pretty" names, although the name meanings are also quite important to her. Needless to say we found it a bit difficult to agree, although with a little help from a book of names we managed to create a list of 19 names we both liked.
We decided that we would allow our family and some close friends to vote for our baby's name. Democracy can sometimes produce undesirable outcomes but as we thought each of the names was perfectly good, it seemed an excellent way to have people involved in our child's life from even before she was born. Additional benefits were also knowing what names people didn't like and being able to share with our child in the future the choices her whole family made for her. Obvious secondary advantages include the knowledge that if - when she is older - she doesn't like her name, we have the evidence with which to blame Grandad and Auntie Suzie.
Most importantly, we wanted to involve people who are close to us - and not least to make them feel involved. After all, they're going to play important roles in our child's life, so why shouldn't they have a say?
Of course, questions were raised between us about which electoral system should be used and what the terms of the franchise should be. Debate raged about whether STV or AV was better (we eventually settled for the preferential system used in the Eurovision song contest, how very me!) and how old people should be before they should vote. That was settled quite easily: anyone who can write the numbers 1 to 8 is perfectly equipped to vote. And so everyone in our family aged from 5 upwards was sent a pink ballot form.
I must say that most people were more than happy to take part in democratically choosing the name! The children seemed far more excited than expected, and indeed some were so thrilled by their first experiences of democracy that they can't wait to vote in a "proper" election. Interestingly, the children seemed to get the idea of preferential voting much easier than some of their elders did. They were also very excited about knowing the outcome and analysing the results in astonishing depth (I suspect we have some future psephologists and statisticians in the family).
We also received some very nice messages from the voters, the highlight I think being this: "How wonderful to allow us to pick your daughter's name...this is a lovely idea and Keanu [6 year old boy] was excited picking names. All the best."
As is perhaps to be expected with preferential voting systems, strange and unexpected results can be thrown up. Names we thought would do well did not, while others we considered to be a bit adventurous and less likely to do well proved very popular. After everyone had made their choices the most popular six names were:
1) Xanthe 2) Emma 3=) Rebekah 3=) Heidi 5) Aaliyah 6) Charlotte
It wasn't necessarily the case that we would go with the most popular name, especially when there were very few points separating the top handful. I have to admit preferring Heidi or Emma but eventually we agreed to abide by the express verdict of the voters!
My brother asked me "did you know you've named your daughter after a Greek football team?" Well, there is a team (and a town) called Xanthi, but surely Xanthe is a much more unique name than Chelsea, Charlton, Everton or other clubs children sometimes share their names with. Of course Xanthe is a Greek name, the meaning of which is "bright". I'm pretty sure she'll live up to this in more ways than one.
So, that's the story of how we used democracy to select our girl's name. The outcome was not what we expected, but it was terrific to have so many people involved and interested - and quite exciting tallying up the points as the forms gradually came in. I suspect we're not going to carry the democratic principle into every aspect of our parenting though...
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